Supafly.com

I have to stop traveling at so much. In 2004, I was in the studio 50 hours each week for 52 weeks. That might seem like an unimpressive time sheet for an over-achiever, but consider that I spent 43 of 52 weekends on the road. That’s a lot of work. I am proud of these numbers, but I’m beginning to feel stunted by the grind.

In the three years since I’ve graduated college, I have been in a creative gridlock. I have tremendous creative freedom at lifeteen.com, and I love every pixel of it. I have creative freedom when I travel and speak. So what’s the problem? I have no time or energy to be creative with other projects. I could keep doing this work/travel thing, but I will inevitably keep doing the same thing. I’m ready for something new.

Maybe all kids from “The Real World” deal with this problem–the inability to see beyond the present “good life”. In a society that adores fame and fortune, most people wouldn’t think twice about going on a TV show. You just do it. And that’s what I did. If you have a chance to do another show, you better damn well do it. What could be better?

I meet random people on the street, and they are always ready to tell me who’s on the new Road Rules Challenge. It’s fun for me to hear, because a lot of these people are my friends, and it’s always good to hear what friends are up to. But when you see the same people going back on yet another show, I can’t help but wonder, what are you doing with your life? Will you be doing this when you are 30? 40?

It seems like the Road Rules Challenge has become a career for some people. For other kids from reality shows with no sequels, the thing to do after your show is to travel and speak at universities. This is the ultimate affirmation for someone who’s trying to sort out their identity. When you have a booked speaking schedule, you know that you were cool on television. People like me, they really do! But you’re not just an airhead celebrity, you are smart and eloquent. You are worthy of standing behind the podium at a university, commanding the attention of academia.

And that’s what I’ve done for the past four a half years, and I am ready for something different. After clocking in over 225 talks, I am ready to slow down. That means only two weekends a month. This is a difficult decision, because speaking is a ministry, something I love and share with my whole heart. It’s not just a gig. It is my passion! But, it’s time to have a little faith and stop a good thing.

With two weekends free each month, I can make nomoho.com and kustoms.com into very big websites. On the other two weekends, I’ll travel and speak, and have some cool sites for people to check out when I leave.

Tonight Matt Maher held the first night of our church’s college ministry, called College Life. Our parish has had College Life for years, and it’s never seemed to do that well. I was thrilled tonight to see 52 people come to College Life.

The whole time I sat in the group looking up to Matt Maher, so happy that he has this opportunity. He has so much talent and so much to offer to college students, and finally he has a place to do it. I am going to make a point to pray for the College Life group every day. I know that good things will come from this ministry.

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This morning I met with the President and Director of Marketing for Life Teen. I really enjoy spending time with both of them, so this was not so much a meeting as a time to hang out with friends.

We spent two hours trying to make sense of our T-shirt sales. I went on MTV a year ago and wore six Life Teen shirts that I designed. Since then, we’ve sold quite a few shirts. I see them all over Phoenix, and all around the country. So what do you do with success like that?

We talked, scribbled ideas, talked some more, and then we agreed on a couple things. First of all, we are a youth ministry, not a T-shirt company. It’s not our responsibility to clothe our teenagers in beautiful things. But, good design makes everyone happy, so we need to keep doing it. So for 2005, designing shirts is not just something I do when I have free time. Now that’s a part of my job.

I am excited about this because this is another place to spread my creativity. The creative spirit is something that burns deep inside of me. I am only happy when I am creative. It’s going to be rewarding and exciting to help build up a new side to our ministry.

I’ve just been doing a lot of work at the studio. We are eight weeks away from launching Version2 of lifeteen.com, and I need all eight weeks to get parts of the site finished. I’ve been working on this site for a couple years now, so I am READY to be done.

I read in Time Magazine a special feature on the “Science of Happiness”. One of the key factors in being a happy person is “cultivating meaningful relationships.” So after work, I try to find some way to spend quality time with a friend. I found that it’s easy to just be in the same place with someone, but that doesn’t make it quality time. But really, I’m just passing time until Candyce comes back from her vacation in California. It’s just not right for us to be apart this long.

The sun came out for the first time in a few weeks. In Arizona, it’s always sunny, so it seems like the end of the world when there’s a cloud in the sky. But the rain has been wonderful, so I am grateful for every cloud that’s loomed over my day.

01-10-05 “
Monday:
I missed my flight yesterday because I was stuck in a marathon. I wasn’t running, but the course snaked through Phoenix area, subsequently fencing in a lot of streets. I used over a half a tank of gas just trying to find a way out. Finally I did, but by then it was too late.

It’s such a terrible feeling to miss an event. I truly love what I do, and I love the people I work with. I can’t believe I even got on the next flight. The ticket agent told me there was absolutely no room on the plane, and no chance of me getting on. She was so sure the flight was full, she closed the door to the jetway. Then out of nowhere, there was an empty seat, and I was on my way to Burbank.

We were supposed to land in Burbank, but our plane was too heavy for the short runway covered with water. So we kept on flying to Los Angeles and finally landed.; I swear the runway in LA was a shallow lake. I’ve not seen that much rain in a long time.

I guess I wasn’t meant to make it to the event yesterday, because we got stuck in traffic on our way out of the airport. By the time I flopped down on my bed in the hotel, I’m just glad I had finally made it there.

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This morning (Monday) I spoke at Oak Christian High School in Westlake Village, California. I was in intern at YOU! Magazine in ‘97 in Westlake Village, so this trip was kind of a homecoming for me. Even though it’s been seven years, the place looked familiar.

I spoke to the whole high school this morning, then spent to class periods with AP English students. It was fun being in a big room with the whole school, but to go one-on-one in the classroom was awesome. I could be a teacher, I think.

This school was truly a special place. The students should feel blessed to be in such a positive, uplifting place. It seemed like they were all destined to go far. I would have loved to have had a school like that.

I’ve spent all day cleaning up my house: living room, kitchen, dining room, den, my room, and the office/studio. The office is always a disaster, because that’s where Matt Maher records most of his music. I guess music studios are just like that.

I threw away three bags of trash, two of recycled stuff, and three more of stuff to give away. That’s eight bags of stuff leaving my house. Honestly, there’s not much left, just furniture and clothes.

At the bottom of my office drawer I found a binder of business cards from the year 2000 and 2001. These were all the people I met after the Real World through all my trips to Los Angeles and New York.

On each business card, I scribbled notes about the person I had met.

“MTV Video Music Awards, looked like Mafia”
“Shared hotel floor in Vegas. Large black man.”
“Supermodel?”
“Call for free shoes.”

Each card was entered in the binder as I met each person, so each card represented a day in the wild adventure after the Real World. There seemed endless opportunity with every phone number that I got. It was cool for a boy from a small town in Georgia.

My life is still packed with adventure in opportunity, but not like I expected a four years ago after the show. I don’t know, I guess cleaning your house is such an ordinary thing, and I felt unsatisfied after I came across that book of dreams.