I Forgot How to Relax
Daily Life, Growing Up June 11th, 2002Carlos told me that I needed to relax more, but I don’t remember how to relax.
I come home to my apartment, turn on the AC, make a few laps, and then my mind is freakin’ out ready to do something else.
Going out was what I used to do. But, in the past eight months, two friends got married, one is engaged, and another will be soon. So they are kind of done with going out. I would go out by myself, but I’ll have to entertain conversations about a house I used to live in.
The only way I know to relax is to lie down to fall asleep. Even if I don’t snooze off, it is dark and quiet, and that is relaxing.
People tell me not to burn out. I don’t know what I would do if I burned out. I say that not in fear or despair, but out of curiosity. What is it like to be burned out? Do you just stop doing what exhausted you? I don’t understand how to burn out either.
Maybe I am delirious. I just closed this window, and I remembered I like to play golf. It’s been so hot, I’ve not gone and played in a month. That’s how I relax.
It’s too bad you can’t golf in the dark.
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